Garlic... kind of a bitch underneath your fingernails... but damn tasty.

I've lost 14lbs, according to the doc, which means I'm almost back to the weight I was before the health ridiculousness started, so thats good, and the meds aren't messing with my liver and kidney, which I was sure they were because how could I not have horrible side effects?

So I've got new stomach meds, new leg painkiller which i just started and hopefully it does something, and I think/hope/pray things will more or less go back to normal other than the still not being very hungry. I had been okay the last few days, but today food just seems blah. I miss enjoying food, and I feel like life is a little lamer because of it, but if I feel okay later I may make cookies or banana bread.

Summer thunderstorms are very comforting, I wish they'd happen more often. I think I'm meant to be in the pacific northwest where it rains all of the time.

Inevitably, the reason I had to get off the couch and drag myself back to work from 7:45-9:45 turned out not to be a problem, but instead took up a good portion of my night once you include transit, which means I'm finally home and not at all tired, and now my leg hurts worse.

My goals, if you could call them that, are to eat every 3 hours or so this month and actually eat breakfast. I'm not sure how this will go, since there are so few things that make me not ill, but I mostly succeeded today. Work got rid of the one sandwich I ordered from thr cafe, so I won't be eating there anymore, because all I can eat now is a caprese panini (which I thought was pretty shitty) or a salad, which I can make at home. Fail, but it will keep me from spending money. If I have cash I can laways go get nachos, which aren't healthy, but damn tasty.

We also had a mid-afternoon fondue break, which I think should happen every day, because warm chocolate and fruit= delicious.

I'm not sure how or why my 11:10 doctors appointment which was scheduled over a month ago got changed to 4:10, but I suppose such is life. I'm still going to call UIC to make sure the time is right, since all of the updates on upcoming appointments prior to my confirmation call said 11:10. Life is never that easy I suppose.

The nerve damage leg pain is back with a vengence, and I'm temporarily off painkillers until I can figure out what the hell is going on with my stomach, so needless to say since Thursday I've been rather irritable.

Then compounded with info on got on Saturday, it's just sort of like really? I can't just try and deal with physical pain? No, all of this other shit has to get involved, and then work today was just weird. I have to do weekly mtgs with my boss's boss until I'm better or I suppose my boss comes back, and it's helpful since she actually listens, but it's sort of weird nonetheless. It reminds me of just how much I despise my boss, especially when everything is running so well without her, and that's the case whenever she goes on vacation or is not involved with anything.

And then the one co-worker in my division who I actually really like is getting moved into a new division, and the other girl I like is leaving in a month, so that's going to make work that much more lame.

But it's been a 9.5 hour day (with no formal breaks) and I actually had to interact with people and children and shit so I am beat. Especially since it's been at leats a month since I pulled an actual 8 hour day with lunch and everything. It's all been 6 and 7s, so thank god I have tomorrow off, even if I have to run appointments.

Because the painkillers I'm on actually make my leg feel better most of the time, they're going to go ahead and also give me one of the more serious side effects: stomach bleeding/ulcers.

While I do like my doctor, I don't want to have to go in every fucking week.

Body: you fail big time. This does however explain my continued aversion to food and why it makes me feel sick all of the time.

This seriously needs to get taken care of before I leave the country, else I will cry, and/or just die from some horrible disease while in India, because I need to get away from here.

Same talk, different day.
Same follow-up, different feelings.

And the end of the ride draws inexorably closer, but I wish it would hurry up a little.

I have no more sick time, so I'm forced to go and put in a full week. We shall see how it goes, but I'm not really looking forward to it. At least I have no plans Friday, so if I have to call in one day, I can make up the hours, but still, LAME.

Seriously, why do you even bother coming home? It's certainly not to spend time with me.

My freaking leg is killing me, so I've been in bed/the sofa a lot lately. Lame. I can't believe it's July: this year has gone so incredibly fast which is kind of nice, but then I also realize that I've really dropped off the face of the earth too, so I'm getting slightly better at doing that, but not much. Eventually and hopefully soon I'll go back to going out Thursday nights, since I don't think I've done that this year at all, and I miss being more involved in the CS community, and going out and meeting people and being social.

Though, I won't lie. This 60 degree and cloudy/raining weather? Could it be like this every summer? kthx.